Capricorn

I often read my horoscopes, and today's one for a Capricorn like me is a good on.

"Quick-thinking, fast-talking Mercury is perfectly placed so you can find answers to the trickiest questions."

Well, that's good. It seems a shame to waste this celestial gift that we Capricorns have today, so for the greater good I'm going to find an answer to one of the trickiest of questions, how to find peace in the middle east.

So here goes...

Erm...

Well...

I suppose you could....

Nah...

Er...

"Send a box of chocolates, smooth it all over."


So there you have it, either I have just found the solution to the bloodshed out there or astrology is a load of old rubbish. I can't wait to see which.